The past two weeks have been amazing as well as heartbreaking. I've seen God working in my heart, transforming me. I've seen circumstances change; some things seem to be getting better, some worse. I've been challenged to wait. I've also observed parts of my life, the different communities that I participate in, and how they enrich my life.
My favourite community is the one I experience at Campus for Christ. Two Saturdays ago, a bunch of students and staff went up north to Quebec cottage country (near Tremblant) for a day of planning. It inevitably included some very funny bonding moments like walking on the frozen lake, having a really intense snowball fight, eating great food and just hanging out. We spent time in prayer and thought about what God had done this year at McGill. We included some newer, younger students in the planning this year. It was really encouraging to me how God has brought these new women (and men!) into the group. I've been inspired by their willingness and passion.
This past weekend I travelled to the States with one of my closest friends, Amelia. Her family blessed me in so many ways. They were loud and funny and caring all at the same time. Her brothers treated me like one of the family. I realized that I missed out in growing up without siblings. I look forward to having a big family some day. We visited some great places with her family: Philadelphia - the art museum, the liberty bell, the constitution center; New York City - the World Trade center site, the oldest church in the city, Broadway Ave, Statue of Liberty (from afar). What an amazing time. That was my first time being south of the border and being old enough to remember. I've now been to three states: New York, New Jersey and Pennsylvania.
I am really looking forward to going to Calgary this summer on a missions trip. Being in North Africa two summers ago I realized that Canada needs God's love just as much as any other place in the world. I want to be used by God here. I've thought a lot about my summer plans, and decided that this is the best use of my time. Not only will I be working and making money for school, but I'll be working with other Christians from across Canada. We'll be doing evangelism and holding events in order to reach communities in Calgary with the good news that Christ offers us eternal life, love, joy and peace, more than this world could ever give.
So I guess I've had some pretty awesome times lately, but life has been tough. There's a lot of stuff in my own heart that I need to work through. I realize that my desire to please people doesn't do anybody any good. I really need to look to God for guidance. I've noticed that some old sin has been coming back. I really need to stop lying to people. I've wrecked some relationships, believe it or not.
I've been worried about subletting my apartment for the summer. I wonder what I'll do with Teddy (my puppy dog) for the four months that I'm Calgary. I don't know how to make things better with my mom. I don't have much money left, and some times I worry about giving up my favourite things like the occasional Soy Chai latte, and about how I'll pay for my flight to Calgary.
God, I want to trust you.
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